Purple Rain

It’s raining Pete, you idiot, what are you thinking? He’s just standing there outside on the garden path. He knows I’m here. He looks so torn up. I suppose I should be sorry, I didn’t mean for this to happen. Seeing him standing there like that…hoddie soaked wet, slick to his skin and miserable it makes me feel sick. I only wanted to see him smiling or laughing again. I missed that about him. I missed it so much.

I never meant for this to cause so many problems for him. I wasn’t thinking I guess, I mean he has a girlfriend and we’re all on holiday away from each other. Fall Out Boy is on holiday. It was too sweet to bump into him at that club by accident. For once it wasn’t a phone call or a web cam feed. I make it a point to never get drunk, I don’t even drink really but the one time I let lose I bump into him and Ashlee on a date.  

I never wanted to be a one-time thing, I didn’t want to be a one-weekend lover, but if I couldn’t be more…then I wanted to be a best friend always. God knows I would never want to break them up Pete’s so happy with her but I…and he didn’t pull away…and she saw us in the middle of the dance floor. Everything is getting a bit much for her I think…poor girl and I made it worse. So she’s not talking to him and he’s not even acknowledging my existence. Till today.

I think he’s crying. In some ways I’m glad it’s raining so hard, the paparazzi dogs won’t see him, even with their water proof camera’s. Besides even if they were able to capture him they wouldn’t see what I can see right now. Or feel what I can feel. I’m going out there.

What is it you want Pete? Do you want another apology? Do you want me to tell you why I did it? Do you want me to help you understand? Are you here to ask me how to fix everything? Stop the tabloids from chasing you and the lies from following you around. How can you just stare at me like that?

“And talk about eccentric Pete Wentz was seen standing outside Patrick Stump’s LA house for 10 minuets in yesterday’s downpour before Stump came out to see him. An eyewitness who saw the event called us up saying ‘He stood there and when Patrick opened the door they just looked at each other. Then after a minute or so Pete went up to Patrick and led him out into the rain. I think they must’ve been talking or something’. Maybe Fall Out Boy’s next tour should be titled ‘Singing in the rain’”

He walked up to Patrick, eyes glossy and wet and he reached out. Patrick’s skin felt warm to the touch as Pete softly took hold of his wrist. He walked backwards drawing Patrick out into the heavy shower though Patrick barely flinched.

“I just want the world to stop turning for a minute, I want a second to just be. And I want to just be with you for this moment” Pete whispered ignoring the extended silence that had built up between them and forgetting the fact that Patrick’s actions were part of the reason why he was so depressed right now. He pulled Patrick to him and Patrick immediately wrapped his arms around him, encircling him. Pete rested his head on Patrick’s shoulder and Patrick shuddered at the feeling of Pete’s cold wet skin and hair against his neck.

“Why does the world have to be such a fucked up place sometimes?” Pete said sniffing the gentle beat of water drumming on the ground nearly drowning it out.

“I don’t know” Patrick whispered.

“Patrick Stump and Pete Wentz were seen snuggling out on the front lawn of Stumps house last week. A family member of Pete’s had this to say ‘They’re very close and this break is hard for both of them, I think they’ll be happy when Fall Out Boy gets together again’. With Pete’s reported bi-sexuality there might be more than meets the eye to these close knit rockers”      

“In all of this Patrick we’ve been there for each other haven’t we? We’ve known each other for years and years, we’ve practically been living together for most of that time yeah?” I say leaning back, breaking the embrace as slowly as I possibly can. He smiles that sweet schoolboy smile.

“Yeah we have” he replies. I think of Ashlee for a moment and what a great relationship we have had, it’s lasted so long and she’s really understood me. I can even see her pretty smile in my minds eye now but it’s different from Patrick’s and right now I can’t even get her to see me let alone smile. Everything’s gone so horribly wrong but that’s why I’m here. I’m here because no matter what happens between me and Patrick or me and Ash he will always be there for me.

“Well we’ll make it through this too. We’ll make it through together cause I love you man. That’s the truth and whatever reason you have for what happened…I want to hear it. I’m ready to hear it now” I say and I mean every word of it, with every cell in my body I mean it. He looks me in the eye and I can see it, I can see how hard this is for him and oh god he’s crying. Patrick never makes a big thing out of crying, he doesn’t moan or sob he just sniffs and swats away whatever tears trickle down his cheeks only today he’s not wiping them away. Oh god he’s turning away from me.

“…Patrick?”       

He’s stopped moving half of his body facing me; half facing the front door that’s calling to him but the shadow falls on my side.

“Ashlee Simpson’s star crossed romance with excentric Fall Out Boy Pete Wentz has seemingly come to an end. The young starlet has been seen eating out and shopping with a mystery man. There have been whispers of a fight between Simpson and Wentz in a popular new club a month ago. Simpson’s assistant has divulged there has been a quarrel but will say no more on the matter. Maybe this argument will give Wentz some new inspiration for his car crash heart lyrics”

“I was drunk” I hear myself say though I know it’s not the whole truth. It’s just a fact, I feel I could give it to him printed on a small card and it would mean as much. Of course I was drunk. I blink twice staring at my sodden lawn and nothing else.

“I missed you so much and I wanted to…show you…” My voice is stuttering now, the words aren’t coming easy; I didn’t expect them to but they’re falling out and hitting the ground clumsy, covered in cracks from my breaking voice. Rain penetrates another layer of clothing; I can feel it beginning to touch my skin “How much you meant to me without all this…talk”
With all the mobile phone cameras in the world I wonder how there isn’t a picture of the kiss plastered to the sites that call us lovers. Maybe they’re happy with their Photoshop edits.  

“You love me?” I can hear him ask, voice as cool as the water drumming down our bodies. I know what to say, I know he’ll understand and I almost smile for my idea, except for the fact that our relationship hangs in the balance. My head moves to view him and I meet his eyes the wet green of the grass replaced by warm waiting brown.  

“No” I say and see his expression falter so I don’t delay “We’re not homosexuals but we’re willing to learn” handing him a weak smile with my movie quote. Pete catches it like a pro. His head hangs and he shakes it, palms finding his hips. After a moment he looks up again tears swelling in his eyes making them shine and a wonky smile pulls his lips up at the corners.

“Would…would they send us somewhere special?” he questions with a few choked giggles.

“Yeah…at least they would send you somewhere special” Patrick panned letting a snigger out.

“No doubt dude, no doubt” Pete replied. We watch each other for a while soaked, saturated in each other’s presence. Pete’s converses lift off the dirt as he steps forward slipping his arms loosely into my jacket. I don’t move I just wait for his que after all it was my action that nearly ended us. He leans closer and I close my eyes a second later feeling his lips flush against my cheek. His soft mouth lingers there before slipping away a rough cheek replacing it.

“Lets go inside” Pete whispers but I catch nothing in his voice, just Pete.

“Ok”

“Exciting news: Fall Out Boy has announced their new album would be coming out in a few months! ‘There’s not an exact date yet but we’re hoping to get it out by the end of summer’ Punk Prince Pete Wentz told interviewers at the MTV music awards. ‘It’ll be a different sound to our last album but it’ll be awesome’ guitarist for Fall Out Boy Joe adds. Patrick Stump, lead singer, and Andy Hurley, drums, look just as excited about the mysterious new album as their fans have been. In other Fall Out Boy related news Ashlee and Pete’s break seems to be over as they were seen snuggling together by the pool at Ashlee’s mansion. ‘Things have never been better’ Pete says proudly and we couldn’t agree more”